I seem so lost
by csaj1
Summary: Pottsylvania, our days. Fearless Leader sends Boris Badenov and Natasha Fatale after the moose and squirrel, who are delivering a compromising recording about him.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 01

Boris was in a hurry. he knew that he is already in a five minutes late. for his surprise, he met Natasha in front of the house of Fearless Leader. Natasha was never late. did he forget about the time, they had to visit Fearless Leader's office?  
they ran up together, until the door of their leader. when Fearless Leader phoned Boris, there was something in his voice, Boris couldn't recognize that sound; he never heard it from his mouth before. While running up on the well known floors, Boris looked at Natasha. it lasted only for a second or a half. he saw something different on the woman. of course, he couldn't tell, what, and he didn't have time to think about it more. they reached their destination; Fearless Leader's door. instead of ringing the bell, Boris knocked.  
angry voices from inside, but none of them were understandable words. somebody is coming. Boris looked at Natasha again, this time, Natasha looked back at him, Boris could read in her eyes that she doesn't understand why is he watching her. Boris still didn't know, what did he notice on the woman's look, what was that little thing that changed? was it on her look?  
the door opened slowly; Fearless Leader himself opened it. his minions weren't in the office, only the three of them were in the whole building.  
Fearless Leader invited them in his own and unique style.  
-Komm in! and shadd up. I speak.  
Boris let Natasha in front of him, he knew the old etiquette well, he only was lazy to keep it sometimes. to be precise, in the most of the time. he absolutely knew that, he shall not say any bad words to women, any rants, anything that might hurt their soul. but the anger, he had after failing to kill the moose and squirrel every time, was stronger than keeping the etiquette; he didn't even know, how many times he said to Natasha, or anybody else who was near him "shut up!". only the fact, that moose and squirrel are still existing, without knowing his name, he wasn't able to kill them even he suffered...these thoughts already made him angry.  
Fearless Leader invited them to sit down, again, in his unique style. they sat down. so did Fearless Leader. a big table was between them, behind this table, there was a bigger chair, we could call it throne. painted wood, with red cover on it. under these things, there was a red carpet, the same color what the cover had. "I bet they chose it, it's no coincidence"-thought Boris, who always lost in the details, when he visited this office. but he had to focus on Fearless Leader right now, because he started to speak in a quiet voice, and fast, it was a bit hard to understand.  
-I calld you, because...-he kept a little break -because I have a mission for yu. it's a privat mission, but you still work for the whole government, right? so. yu know the moose and squirrel very well, don't yu. how many times I sent yu to kill 'em! and they still alive!- his voice became louder and angry.- yu know them! and now, yu can't miss killing them! they have something, they are carrying that something at the moment, going to their damned country to take it to their government and make Pottsylavania and I fall!- the whole building would have heard his words, but as I said, there was nobody there, but three of them.  
Boris and Natasha looked at each other. they did it all the time, when Fearless Leader gave them a mission they didn't understand correctly; from this sight Fearless Leader always noticed that his words, sentences were too complicated or he still uses his german accent; after this, he always corrected himself(hated to do this) and told them that they have to kill moose and squirrel. that's the mission. he lost counting how many times he said these words.  
-Yu have to get the pendrive from them and give it to me. that's your mission. -he tried not to speak with accent, but all of us know it was absolutely impossible.  
-Pendrive?- asked Boris, who lived in the past, it's worth to mention that the iron curtain has just fallen, but nothing's changed in Pottsylvania. neither did the technoology they used; only the bigger leaders knew, how to use a computer correctly, and knew what a pendrive is. for the others, it was unnecessary.  
-Yes, I show picture about it.- he found the picture in his drawer and showed to them. -it even had the same color. -there was something on it...something that might make us all fall. mainly me.  
-and what was that thing? we have to know correctly what are we about to steal.- Natasha always spoke about the main questions, the main things, only the necessary ones.  
-yu know, the technology in the west is better than here. some people made an animation...a cartoon about me, what is, we all know, fake, but people will believe it!  
-why?-asked Boris  
- because we are cartoon characters, idiot! mainly people in the US can't make diffrence between original cartoon and cartoon, what ist fake!- german words were coming to his mouth, replacing the language he should have spoken. it happened all the time he lost his patience. not only with these two, with everybody. -there is a cartoon, made by idiots und if it will be on tv, we will all fall, as I said- in the case of Boris and Natasha, it was better if somebody said the same thing twice...or three times.-it's a compromitting one. very.  
-do we-?  
-nein! yu have to steal it from them and give it to me! I must destroy the pendrive! we know that there is no copy about this fake animation. I mean, cartoon.- it was the same, but he thought, it's better to use words they already know.  
- so, find mose and skurl, get the pen drive, and keel them!-Boris tried to sum up their mission.  
-ja. and give the pendrive to me, to destroy. none of yu will watch.  
-none.  
-gut, then go! moose and squirrel are already on half way to the States. I give yu my plane to find them. but do not break any thing!  
it was a serious thing, they thought, if Fearless Leader gives them his private plane. it was a nice, black one, with all the weapons they could dream for. they flew with it only once, when they thought he's going to take them to camp, because they failed again...anyway!  
-are you gone alredy, we have no time! oh, wait for a minute.  
-but Firless Lider, yu told us, we have no time!- said Boris.  
-for this, we have. yu don't have to go together, one of yu are enough. the other can stay here to...to go after the other if failed. I can send the one after the other, du understand!...?  
- not between plans, Firless Lider. none of us go without the other. -said Boris, pointing at the main thing. he and Natasha knew this, it was their most-said sentence-even they never said it in loud before. now, after he did, it surprised both of them. both of them but Fearless Leader, who got angry because they didn't exactly follow his orders. Boris felt that Natasha is looking at him, even he didn't look at the woman. he always felt her look on him, that look, which was unique in the whole world. nobody else could look at Boris, like Natasha. somehow, he felt happy, it always made his frozen heart warmer. this feeling was also unique, like the look itself.  
but this only lasted for a moment, when he blinked next, they were already in front of the door, which was closed with a fast movement. they ran down on the floor, got behind the building where Fearless Leader's plane was standing. starting the plane took only two minutes; they were in the air, flying to the west, trying to get the moose and squirrel.

don't miss our next chapter, which name will be "chapter 02"! 


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 02

Fearless Leader was lost between his memories. he tried to explain somehow, how the hell did he get into a situation, like animation about him?he couldn't even understand, how the small fandom got this far. the fandom was actually small and they knew it well; not only the pottsylvanian government had to check the informations on the internet weekly and delete them, if there were too many of them. but I talked about the memories. he had a lot; he lived a less "peaceful" life already before becoming the füh- excuse me, leader of Pottsylvania. already, in the german army he had a very special job. and now, after the fall of the reich and everything he used to believe in, like thousands of others; he is here, they sent him here, and he has already a different view of the world. quite different.

to be precise not that different...

-hey, narrator!sharrup!

oh, excuse me, I went too far I guess. so, he was sitting at his table, still thinking about, how did he get into a situation like this, and guessing if Boris and Natasha will really get the pendrive. and if they get it, will they really be able to not to watch?

they can't even turn on a laptop. yes, that's why the pottsylvanian leaders are the only people in Pottsylvania who can use the new technology. he ended up thinking about America, the crazy and idiot things that happen there. through the years, his mind might have changed, but his hate about the States didn't. he still wanted to conquer them, take revenge, etc.

and suddenly, he fell out of all his memories. looked around his large office, he heard nothing but his thoughts and the old clock's ticking. there was absolutely nobody around him, no, not at the moment, at any time, absolutely nobody he could yell at, or tell his thoughts, his past, his dreams...in one word, he was absolutely: alone.

but back to our spies, who were travelling with supersonic speed after the train, which was carrying the moose...I mean, Rocky and Bullwinkle. I guess, I don't have to mention that these two knew nothing about that they do even carry a pendrive, after their smaller heroic mission, they were finally going back and trying to take some rest. heroes' life is hard. in Rocky's bag, there was a laptop from the US government, a sandwich, a drink(coca cola, yes) and Bullwinkle's favorite poem-book, with the title "Best of Bullwinkle" in short, BoB. and of course, the pendrive. these two knew a lot of adventures behind them, they lost counting how many times they saved the United States, their town, and each other. but this time, Rocky, who had more in his mind than Bullwinkle, didn't even know that a plane is following their train. yes, finally, Boris and Natasha found the train.

-Any plan?Bomb, TNT, or grenade?-there was too much to choose.

-Dollink, please, we have to get them alive!I mean, the pen drive. whai do we have to drive a pen?

-no, Natasha, that tiny thing. with these new american words, I don't know anymore...enivej, this means, we can't use any of these amazing things?then why did Firless Lider give them to us?

-maybe we lok better with these than just going with a plane and steal the pendrive. but dollink, we need a plan. one of us must go, kick them off and get the pendrive. then yu can make explosion or anything yu like.

but this is the final word!see you in chapter 03, in which more will happen. definetly.


End file.
